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The Song That Didn’t Rhyme (The Eyes of Alice Cooper, 2003)

“The Song That Didn’t Rhyme” Lyrics:

Wrote a song, it was wrong from it`s very first conception
Seemed I struggled on every line
It wasn’t fast, wasn’t pretty, wasn’t serious or witty
The song that didn’t rhyme

The band couldn’t wing it, the singer couldn’t sing it
The Drummer’s always out of time
The DJ`s were offended, my union card suspended
Billboard declared it a crime

The melody blows in a key that no one can find
The lyrics don`t flow but I can`t get it out of my mind
A three minute waste of your time
On a song that didn’t rhyme

It was bland, it was boring, all the groupies there were snoring
The first time we played it live
All the record guys got fired, the president retired
But somehow the song survived

The melody blows in a key that no one can find
The lyrics don`t flow but I can`t get it out of my mind
The melody blows in a key that no one can find
The lyrics don`t flow but I can`t get it out of my mind
A three minute waste of your time
No redeeming value of any kind
But thanks for the twelve ninety nine
On a song that didn’t rhyme

Didn’t expect to revisit ‘The Eyes of Alice Cooper ‘album so soon, but it seems fitting after this past week’s media circus. This post focuses on a humorous track entitled “The Song That Didn’t Rhyme“. A song, unlike its title, which is actually pretty catchy and has found its way on my playlist from time to time. Alice admits, “it’s just one of those songs that was a joke and it ended up having a life of its own.” Either way, the song holds water and carries with it a certain amount of merit in this day and age.

If you’ve been hiding under a rock or don’t know much about the Alice Cooper scene, Alice and Sheryl Cooper were the topic of many headlines earlier in the week. It’s not worth going into specific detail (and honestly, I’d rather not glorify the news outlets that falsely reported the stories) but it was erroneously reported that Alice and Sheryl have a suicide pact with one another. After a 24-hour news frenzy, the story was corrected, yet many news and social media sources were still spewing out the original ‘fake’ news days later and with no reservation. Unfortunately, this isn’t the only time Alice or other folks close to him have been incorrectly reported on.

There have been many misconceptions about Alice over the years – from the notorious ‘chicken incident’ to his identity (confused with Eddie Haskell/actor Ken Osmond) to his religious beliefs to his relationships with others and so on. Tabloids, news outlets, and other sources have been falsely reporting on him and other famous musicians/people for years. In fact, he’s recently noted that his Hollywood Vampires band mate, Johnny Depp, is often slandered in the media as well. Alice states that, “all the stuff you heard last year about Johnny, 99% was just bull.” He went on to state that claims linking Depp to poor health, drugs, and bankruptcy were all untrue. Much like ‘The Song That Didn’t Rhyme” concludes, such ‘news’ stories are a “waste of your time” but “thanks for the twelve ninety-nine”. Apparently, it’s all about the buck in the ‘news’ business, not the proper telling of the story. Especially in today’s world of instant information. Regrettably, such things are bound to get worse as the technology age continues moving forward.

Did you know that Siri, Apple’s AI assistant, was created by using the voice of a woman named Susan Bennet? Susan was hired to read a number of sentences, pronounce certain word patterns and make various sounds with her voice. In turn, those recordings were used to create a virtual text to speech voice that fluidly speaks to humanity – creating its own sentences from Susan’s original recordings. Why is this important and how does it relate to this post? Good question. We are heading into a pretty dangerous direction as to what is real and what is not. Technology has advanced far enough that we will soon hear and see things that have been fabricated and are inaccurate depictions of the truth and reality. How are we, as God’s people, supposed to deal with such things?

Let’s look at this topic from two different angles. 1) How do we handle and process information that doesn’t seem accurate? and 2) How do we cope when slanderous comments are made about us personally?

Processing Information.
We live in an age of information. It is constantly being thrown at us. We spend our days uploading and downloading bits of data. However, a good portion of that information is actually misinformation. Therefore, how do we discern what’s true and what’s false? In God’s Word, Proverbs is the most notable book used to help guide and direct a person seeking wisdom and discipline (while also teaching them what is right, just, and fair). Studying Proverbs leads the reader to understanding and knowledge. That knowledge, when put into practice, becomes wisdom found through the nature of our Lord. While it’s not really possible to summarize Proverbs in one or two sentences, there are a few verses that lay sufficient groundwork for the path to wisdom and discernment. An example of this is Proverbs 3:1-6:

Wisdom Bestows Well-Being

Chapter 3
1My son, do not forget my teaching,
but keep my commands in your heart,
2 for they will prolong your life many years
and bring you peace and prosperity.
Let love and faithfulness never leave you;
bind them around your neck,
write them on the tablet of your heart.
Then you will win favor and a good name
in the sight of God and man.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.

Focusing primarily on verses 5 & 6, we find that the human heart and mind are not properly equipped without Him. Our understanding often falls short or leaves us even more confused. However, His Word brings peace and clarity to areas in life that were once stressful and blurry. When we lean on the Word, resting and trusting in Him, we find a Spirit, His Spirit, of solace and well-being guiding and directing our path. With specific regard to this post’s topic, Proverbs 11:12 clearly states, “the one who denounces his neighbor lacks wisdom, but the one who has discernment keeps silent.” Taking this further and to the New Testament, we find Jesus calling us to “do unto others what you would have them do to you. (The Golden Rule – Matthew 7:12)” Don’t be too quick to believe everything that you see or read. Rely on His peace and mindset as you digest the information of this world.

Dealing with Slander and Libel.
We may also find a certain amount of dishonesty spread about us, our families, and/or our friends as we journey through this life. What seems like harmless gossip at the water cooler, stories told at school, or maybe just minor inconsistencies about who we are or what we’ve done are discouraging and can often lead to serious ramifications for both the person spreading lies and the person they are about. Looking again at Proverbs, we find inspired words about lies and slander. They “lie in wait for blood” (Proverbs 12:6), “separate close friends” (Proverbs 16:28), “have the power of life and death” (Proverbs 18:21), and many other destructive qualities. In short, words have power. The truth uplifts, heals, and restores people while deceit brings the opposite. None of this is easy, but focusing on what the Word shows us is a better way to handle the sins brought against us.

Dealing with slander and libel requires us to guard our hearts. Being sinned against often leads a person to react sinfully themselves. Try to keep that from happening. Know that the truth will prevail. Jesus spoke to this by saying “do not fear those that can destroy the body” (Matthew 10:28). He warns us to instead fear the threat of eternal damnation. If and when you confront the one that has wronged you, be sure to approach them gently (Galatians 6:1). A one-on-one conversation questioning why they said what they did and/or focusing on how you were affected by the wrong is more effective than defaming them or seeking revenge (Matthew 18:15). Always work to overcome evil with good (Romans 12:21). As you walk through this valley, do your best to remain humble as well. Remember the words of Tim Keller, “The gospel is this: We are more sinful and flawed in ourselves than we ever dared believe, yet at the very same time we are more loved and accepted in Jesus Christ than we ever dared hope.” As stated in the previous paragraph, none of this is easy. But if we work towards replacing our ways with His, we are better for it and in turn help to create a better world in the process.

Wrapping up this post, ‘The Song That Didn’t Rhyme’ probes the mind. Listen to it and ponder about the things in life that just don’t seem right. The things that just don’t seem to belong. Sometimes things we are fed as truth have a slight, or gaping, disconnect associated to the ‘facts’. Somehow there is a steady flow of misinformation. Stories and news reports that ‘don’t flow’ and have no sufficient evidence, only heresy. But somehow, we ‘can’t get (them) out of (our) mind(s)’. Ask yourself a few questions. Where do you get your information? Is it trustworthy? When something doesn’t line up, how do you react? Do you use wisdom and discernment? Do you take all information at face value? Information is tearing us apart. However, God’s Word calls us to unity (1 Corinthians 1:10) – Let’s do our best to rewrite this song. Using His key. His words. His beat. His timbre. His LOVE.

In conclusion, what a week. It started with false news about Alice and Sheryl, but notice how that was handled. There was no animosity on the Coopers’ part. Just a simple correction. Alice simply states, “We have a LIFE pact. We love life so much. What I was meaning was that because we’re almost always together, at home and on the road, that if something did happen to either of us, we’d most likely be together at the time. But neither of us has a suicide pact. We have a life pact.” Beautifully handled. Then mid-week, we learn Alice will be on “Mickey and the Roadster Racers” which will air on Friday, July 5th at 8am ET. Playing the role of Alistair Coop De Ville (an old friend of Goofy’s uncle), Alice comments on the character saying, “it’s kind of nice to not be a villain for once.” And finally, travel and rehearsals begin this week as Alice’s tour starts on July 4th in Mashantucket, CT. We pray for the health and safety of all the wonderful people involved with Alice’s tour and shows. May the Lord bless and keep them as they embark on this year’s tour!

Have you accepted Christ as your Savior?

If you would like to accept Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior, please pray the following prayer:

"God, I believe in you and your son Jesus Christ.  I believe that Jesus died on the cross and rose from the grave to save me. Today, I invite Jesus into my heart to stay.  I make you Lord over my life. Make me new. Wash me, Lord, and cleanse me. In Jesus Name, Amen"

If you have just prayed that prayer, we want to celebrate your new victory with you.  Please contact us at so we can welcome you into the kingdom.  We don't want you to have to walk alone and we have some resources we would like the opportunity to share with you.

NOTE: We’d also like to share the following resources used by “Fridays With Alice.” Without these books and sites, this would be a much more complicated endeavor. So be sure to check them out if interested.

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